Summer Goals

5 weeks of nannying - Check
Enjoying my last moments with friends and family - Check
Independent study contract for graduate credits - Almost Check
Financial Support for my internship - _________
GRE - ______
Apply to the Hubert H. Humphrey Center - ________
Read Paul Farmer book - ________

Time to get my butt into gear.

GO GO Gadget *ACCOMPLISH GOALS*

Conversations

As I have mentioned in my plans to connect with people in my "Networking" post, I have been very busy with 1-to-1s. (1-to-1s are relationship building conversations used as a framework for connecting individual interest and passions within public work)

Here is a synopses of some of my conversations:

Dennis Donovan

I met with Dennis on a very special day - "One day without shoes" (www.toms.com). I walked to campus barefoot as a way to experience what life is like without shoes and to understand the challenges people in this world face because they do not have the ability to afford shoes of their own. From this activism and the brief conversations with curious onlookers as I walked, I was already feeling energized. My conversation with Dennis heightened my mood and consciousness, even more. He could see my excitement radiating as I began to share my story and reciprocated with support and advice. Guidance from him as a globally prominent community organizer and a veteran advisor for similar projects gave me a great start to my networking journey. He stresses the listening and looking into other cultures instead of assuming and analyzing which has helped me understand the role I need to take in a culture when I am abroad. So often third world countries and organizations are told what they need from outsiders trying to "fix" problems. My challenge from Dennis is to look beyond these assumption models and facilitate myself in a way that can sustain locally fostered capacity of the people.

Sherry Gray

Sherry is the coordinator of the global policy area at the Hubert H. Humphrey School of Public Affairs (the hopeful future site of my education). This woman has such a warm heart and supportive attitude. I received her name from a coworker and wrote to her on a whim, in hopes that she could assist me in my efforts throughout the internship experience. Though she has little experience with Kenya, her travel wisdom could be put into a series of encyclopedias. She gave me invaluable advice as well as comprehensive travel information to save myself time and money while ensuring my safety and livelihood. Beyond her advice, she has been supporting my efforts to arrange a directed study contract for this internship. This contract is important because it would give me funding through the university as well as credits and field experience towards my graduate education. She has even gotten me thinking about enrolling in the Master of Development Practice instead of the Master of Public Policy.

Paul Walters

Paul is a second year Public Policy student and the Humphrey Center who did an internship in Nairobi last summer. We met to discuss working in Kenya and ended up connecting on multiple levels. I am not sure I have ever met someone with such a similar path and goals as my own. Our professional drives and personal ambitions were extremely parallel which allowed us to communicate well. There are some real chances for collaboration between our work in the future. The conversation was uplifting as he gave me very honest insights of working in Nairobi. I am planning to be in contact with the agency that he interned for as they have a youth program every Saturday. I am definitely interested in working with children and Paul is going to connect me with the director. I love children and often find them inspiring to my work and amazing resources of information when learning a new culture. Their innocence and love for simple adventure help to eliminate negative feelings about my life and offer a lighter time than some of the daunting work entailed in this "real world" people talk about. I look forward to that community while I am there.

Basil Mahayni

This semester I took a course that turned out to be a chance of destiny. The class title is a mouth full - Environmental and Economic Development of the Third World, but basically it has been a preparatory class for international work. I have learned the history of British Colonization all the way through to current agricultural consumption systems and everything in between. We analyze the economic and environmental interconnections that have been created, manifested in or eliminated by the push for development. Basil is my TA and as he so delicately put, I am a "blank page" for this information and completely fell in love with the holistic systems approach to understanding international livelihoods. He is such an intelligent person and I have learned so much from this course and through our conversations outside of the classroom. Basil has done work in Bolivia but beyond that his extended family lives in Syria and he is focusing his PHD work within their environmental and economic systems. His academic focus and personal experiences with working and traveling back and forth between cultures opened my eyes to the emotional journey that I will be exposed to, soon. On the other side of that coin he made me very aware of the ideal mindset for entering this kind of work - It is not about me. This will be especially challenging as I am very analytical about my world as I see it. I must now put my mind in a place ready to listen and discover what I do not experience. This advice is priceless as I have the time to prepare my outlook and inner-motivations of my work with KNCHR and the people of Kenya. I must, again, find a way to make my skills useful to build the human capacity that can be sustained locally.

Listen to the answers of your questions.

I have been living the past couple of years trying to pay attention to life with an open mind and question the world as I experience it. I also constantly evaluate myself so I know the exact place I make my decisions from and what makes my knees shake.  What I have come to conclude from endless analyzation is that experience is what a person makes of what they have. Not just what they own or what is in front of them but what they have inside of their souls. Experiences are filtered through expectations and assumptions built upon individually unique pasts. Scenes are perceived after they have been filtered, differently, in each person. Our subjective views are never as clear cut as they may seem. From experience, I know the only way to see what picture came out on the other side of someone else's filter is by asking them questions and listening to the answers. Where do they make their decisions from and what makes their heart race? I would really like to know.

My entire wealth of motivation for my future is rooted by exchanging stories that connect people.  My parents could tell you stories about my abilities to talk for, what seems like days, and I think I have figured out a way to channel that "talent" into the most energizing life path. Conversations in my life, recently, have all been meaningful. I have exchanged my goals and passions with those of strangers, confidantes and old friends. Each story renews my sense of reality as I say the word "Africa" more times in a day than I have said in my entire life.  Yet, this reality was built in a dream so I constantly have to remind myself to be present because this is actually reality.

Networking

As this semester of limited free-time comes to an end, I am beginning a journey of sharing my story and accumulating connections for my internship in Kenya. The skills I learned from community organizing at the University of Minnesota have really taught me the value of sharing stories and connecting stakeholders of shared visions to insure efforts are supported from multiple resources. I have to find people, organizations, ministries and government officials who would be interested in the experience I am about to embark upon. I am looking to find interests and values that align with my own and the goals of this human rights internship.

The first place I am going to seek such connections is the office of Dennis Donovan. He is the innovative founder of the youth organizing movement called Public Achievement of which my leadership minor education has been derived. He is also the co-director at the Center for Citizenship and Democracy, formally housed the the Hubert H. Humphrey Institute of Public Affairs. His networking expertise and unlimited local and international connections are available to those who are interested in working to organize and create effective change. Dennis' openness to meet with active citizens and advise or connect their journeys to branches of his extensive network creates a stable foundation for the proposed ventures. He is an inspiring activists and talented engagement professional whom I hope to have with me throughout this journey and especially as I return and reflect upon my own organizing efforts.

I have been researching other possible stakeholders and am currently contacting non-profits, cultural associations, businesses, academic researchers and others who would possibly be invested in my work abroad. All I can do is share my story and hope that others connect with it.

This blog is a direct way to share my story and I ask that the readers keep checking back with it and stay connected with me, personally. I am going to need an ample amount of support for this experience and appreciate it all forms. Please share my story with those you know by sending them my blog address ( caitmcd4.blogspot.com ) or contact information ( cmcdaniel4@gmail.com ) and feel free to send me contacts and suggestions!!

Introspection

My investment in this city makes moving on such a heartbreak. I am so jazzed that I have the opportunity to travel to Kenya for this internship but the reality of it all is internally devastating. How can I voluntarily give up the life that has facilitated such accomplishment and heightened life value? I anticipate daydreaming just to spend time with the people I am going to miss. I fret over the future missed life experiences with those that have made the past few years an absolute wonderland.  My life is you all - You give me infinite reasons to smile. Saying good-bye is scary and the "what-ifs" and "maybes" run my thoughts some days. I wonder what my life would be like if I didn't go. Then I remember how I got here, how I was able to obtain this position and realize the chance I would be giving up - There is no way I do not go (sorry Mom and Dad).

The best counter to these preoccupying thoughts are the images I have of the life I will be living abroad. Carolyn Edlebeck, my friend from Waupaca, WI who is in Uganda for a year, wrote to me last week detailing her days outside of work.

"I read when I want, do word-finds, study for the GRE, take naps, talk on the front porch, walk down the dirt road to one of the few refrigerators in town to buy a cold bottled soda (when the electricity is on), and I just enjoy BEING." 

I look forward to this change the most. I look forward to leaving behind the hustle of American culture; the crazy flip-flop of priorities, favoring productive work over taking time for relationships and self. My Minneapolis expiration date has been set and I will leave behind so much of my heart. You can guarantee I will be back to collect those pieces and re-place them among new additions.

Now, I face a long road leading up to this journey. Financial support is not available from the Human Rights Commission. I am funding my own trip and have struggled to find scholarships for my specific situation; graduated student in an independent internship. I am hoping to gain support and emotional investment from local stakeholders. I know if I share my story thus far with others they will feel the passion from my words and understand this is the next step and a really great leap forward for myself and whatever work I am invested in.

Working hard to gain support and get there will make stepping off of the airplane a monumental moment in this journey. Knowing that I made it. I look forward to that moment, especially knowing the flight is lengthy =).

'Hours will never come back to you, but by mind.' A quote from one of my professors.

Dear Time, slow down. Love, Me.

It is officially March. I have repeatedly verbalized my disbelief for the hurried onset of this month and this morning my sentiment has not changed. I am not okay with time passing so quickly. I have gotten minimal sleep this semester which means I have had longer days. Yet, with each alarm I am astonished by the numbers on my calender. I suppose the busier the days, the faster they pass. I really look forward to slowing down sometime in the future.

Due to my packed schedule, I have not had much time to dedicate to investigating the details of my trip to Kenya. Two weeks ago I met with Carolyne Abong (Humphrey Fellow from KNCHR who gave me the internship) and she filled me in on a few things. The four previous interns were from Harvard and Columbia Universities - woah. I will be going there for six months but have the option of extending my stay for any reason. I have weekends off as well as a mandatory two week holiday in December (COME VISIT ME!!!) for relaxation, family and travel. There are three other KNCHR locations throughout Kenya that I will have the opportunity to move to for a couple of weeks each. This will give me the opportunity to see other parts of the country with their unique people, culture and human rights programs. I will be living in a rented out room or apartment that the internship coordinator will help me find. There are numerous UN bases and programs throughout Kenya which house plenty of international interns. Carolyne thinks I will meet some of them and eventually choose to move into a home with them - I hope so as well. My daily work will vary. I will be doing tasks around the main office, sitting in on conferences and writing reports, creative program planning, human rights investigations, field travels, and anything else I really want to do.

Carolyne has given me the opportunity to guide my own internship; I can do as much or as little as I would like. This is very exciting for two reasons. First, I am able to do whatever I want - which will be a lot!! Second, I am very excited to live in a culture that really wants each person to be themselves and enjoy the road. Carolyne assured me I will have an amazing experience.

It scares me how real this is...

Happy

I have been trying to find the words to articulate my mood, recently. I went to the Walker Art Center this weekend and came across this text based work in which the painted letters, appear to be created from adhesive tape. The simplicity of the piece with such bright words really encompassed my feelings about my life these days. It is hard to describe to someone else the way you are feeling and the reasons that you are feeling that way. This piece lays it out with simplicity and pure meanings.

Officially Official

Today I received an emailed confirmation letter for my internship placement from the Kenya National Commission on Human Rights - It was on letterhead and everything!!!

This means that I am OFFICIALLY going to Kenya - WHAT??? I cannot believe it.

Before this year I did not have goals. Going to Kenya was the first goal I ever set for myself and am in awe of this personal feat. I will forever look back on this year and remember lessons learned. The most important: Goals can take you to the moon and back (or in my case, Africa).

Inspiration - by Duncan Walker

Human Rights Center Fellowship Grant

Tonight, I am finishing my application for a fellowship grant to fund my trip to Kenya. The details of which I am uncertain. It has been a struggle to get the materials and information necessary to finish my application from Carolyne and the KNCHR. I have so many questions and cannot find the answers on the internet or in a book. I went to speak with the coordinators of the fellowship program and was reminded of the harsh deadlines we Americans put on ourselves that do not exist in other cultures. This exchange of information has been a somewhat frustrating cultural experience with the "pole-pole" society in other nations. My goals and drive have gotten me this far and now it seems my need-to-do everything nature does not benefit in this situation. Though the challenge of getting the last bits of my application together is out of my hands, I feel confident in the details I have put together and feel motivated to continue this hard-work towards other scholarship and grant ventures.